I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize