i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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