so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize