i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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