In the future we'll all be gay
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
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