wat bout pragnant strippers??
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
