Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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