Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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