wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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