Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize