ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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