I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Randomize