For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
