Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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