I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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