I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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