why didn't you poke me back
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
