he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
