sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
