just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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