Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
