just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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