and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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