no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize