Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
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