i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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