she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize