He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
