i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
