Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
please don't ironically join a cult
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