it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
