I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
