the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
only you would photoshop your dick
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
