it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
