Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
