Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
