oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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