Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize