I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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