Do you still have your period?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
