Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
as a side note pls kill me
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize