Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
