dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
