haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
