Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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