Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Please don't give away my fajitas
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
