So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
