Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
