drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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