this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
